Dear Life, After 14 days of oral chemo, a 5-hour infusion of a monoclonal antibody, and an injection of a white blood cell booster, “What is going on inside of my body?” I can easily say, “A lot”. There are moments I feel light-headed and many moments I feel fatigue. Bones ache. Some swelling. But enough of that. Here is the painting done yesterday. Creating new work inspires me to get my body to the studio and move the energy into the drawings and paintings. It is healing. It is life. It is a good with life grace.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Ink, Tempera and Acrylic on Paper 12″x 9″

Dear Life, Yesterday I had a five-hour, 9am -2pm, infusion of Gazyva and Day 14 of Revlimid, oral chemo med. Today is a white blood booster injection at 9:00am to lift me off of the ocean floor. These chemicals are a life saver by stopping Large Cell Lymphoma from amassing in my body. I went to the studio at 2:00pm and worked. Did a drawing and painting. My creative spirit is swimming in the high end of this ocean. Thank you.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Tempera Paint on Paper 12″x9″ 02.29.2024

Love Letter to Life 02.28.2024 Still-Life

Dear Life, I had a 5 hour Still-Life painting class and my teacher saved the day. I told him, “I hate this painting. Can you help it?” I handed him a brush and in a couple of strokes, he transformed the piece. I said, “I give you an A+”. We laughed. I went to my studio afterward and did the painting you see here. I am primarily an abstract painter. Lots of energy. Expression. Feeling the wind, the storm of cancer meds, the political unrest in the USA, disturbances worldwide. A far cry from a still-life. Life.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Acrylic on Paper 12″x9″ 02.27.2024

Love Letter to Life 02.27.2024 Shadow/Light

Dear Life, I woke yesterday feeling like a truck had hit me. But my class had a field trip so I lovingly urged my Body to go. The Vladem Contemporary Art museum exhibit, Shadow/Light, is excellent. I then went to the studio and worked on my series of drawings and paintings. I saw the influence of the exhibit appear in the painting. A tiny paintbrush delighted my Spirit making “marks… cells, stars, snow, light.” How the energy of an artist’s body and work unfolds is a mystery. But showing up and being in the flow is imperative. Day 11 of Revlimid, oral chemo.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Graphite Drawing/Acrylic Painting on Paper 12″x9″

Dear Life, On Day Nine of oral chemo, a rumbling stomach kept me close to home for the morning. At 1:00pm I made my way to the studio. My new project of drawings and paintings calls up the energy I need to create, dancing with the physical demons and angels, the elements and the full moon. Grateful I went to my space where I rise above it all. Day Nine Revlimid drawing & Snow Moon painting on the studio wall with a found object.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Day Nine Revlimid Graphite Drawing 12″x9″ and Snow Moon Acrylic Painting 12″x9″

Dear Life, I felt challenged this week. An old “friend” Yackity, the negative voice within me, showed up in my studio fueled to tell me all that was wrong with being at school, having cancer, what terrible work I was doing and how great everyone else was in comparison. I took all my paintings off the walls and went home. I took a long walk and a day off. I returned to the studio yesterday. I told Yackity, “I hear you but don’t believe you. Thank you for sharing”. Then went to work. I am making 12″x9″ drawings and paintings titled Revlimid, day 1, day 2, etc. Also working large and using oil pastels. I woke excited today at 5:30am with the “snow” Full Moon ready to return to the studio. Quaking to go!
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Acrylic and Oil Pastel on 12″x9″ Paper

Dear Life, My friend Virginia King took this selfie of us during a recent visit. I am grateful for the incredible people in my life: friends and family, the 12-Step fellowship, the SFCC students and staff, The Isolation Journals and online community, artists, neighbors, and all the people I meet in my day. Today, I will be with the Green Cleaning crew who are going to clear my apartment of “construction dust and dirt” and leave it very green clean. I left my apartment on January 12th, six weeks ago, after finding a leak causing mold. The move home will begin. Alchemy is happening of people, places, things!
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

PRM & VK 02.18.2024

Dear Life, Showing up is 90% of success. Lift my head off the pillow as the sun rises, do my morning spiritual practices, drink coffee, journal, eat breakfast, take meds, shower, dress, and pack lunch. Drive to the community college looking at 360 degrees mountain ranges and big sky. Park Blue Angel, carry my stuff into the studio and show up. My body is adjusting to new routines and oral chemo. Getting in the flow of painting. I am grateful. My body is a miracle. I am showing up.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Acrylic on Paper 30″x22″

Love Letter to Life 02.18.2024 Lymphoma Cells

Dear Life, It’s very unlike me to use “stamping” as a painting method but here you have it. The empty applesauce container was on the palette sitting in red and blue paint. My hand reached for it and started “stamping”. After I finished, I googled Lymphoma Cells something as a rule I do not do. There they were, clusters of cells in bluish-red, floating in an aquamarine sea. My intuition painted what have been guests in my body for at least five years. Six months of scans look clear. Have the “guests” finally left? Day three of oral chemo meds to keep the “house” clean.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Acrylic and Tempera on Paper 36″x30″