Dear Life, My friend Virginia King took this selfie of us during a recent visit. I am grateful for the incredible people in my life: friends and family, the 12-Step fellowship, the SFCC students and staff, The Isolation Journals and online community, artists, neighbors, and all the people I meet in my day. Today, I will be with the Green Cleaning crew who are going to clear my apartment of “construction dust and dirt” and leave it very green clean. I left my apartment on January 12th, six weeks ago, after finding a leak causing mold. The move home will begin. Alchemy is happening of people, places, things!
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

PRM & VK 02.18.2024

Dear Life, Showing up is 90% of success. Lift my head off the pillow as the sun rises, do my morning spiritual practices, drink coffee, journal, eat breakfast, take meds, shower, dress, and pack lunch. Drive to the community college looking at 360 degrees mountain ranges and big sky. Park Blue Angel, carry my stuff into the studio and show up. My body is adjusting to new routines and oral chemo. Getting in the flow of painting. I am grateful. My body is a miracle. I am showing up.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Acrylic on Paper 30″x22″

Love Letter to Life 02.18.2024 Lymphoma Cells

Dear Life, It’s very unlike me to use “stamping” as a painting method but here you have it. The empty applesauce container was on the palette sitting in red and blue paint. My hand reached for it and started “stamping”. After I finished, I googled Lymphoma Cells something as a rule I do not do. There they were, clusters of cells in bluish-red, floating in an aquamarine sea. My intuition painted what have been guests in my body for at least five years. Six months of scans look clear. Have the “guests” finally left? Day three of oral chemo meds to keep the “house” clean.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Acrylic and Tempera on Paper 36″x30″

Dear Life, My instructor challenged me to paint the trauma of cancer on a larger scale. He said my work in small books is beautiful, intimate, and illustrating the love letters. Can I size up to a large format and put my body into the experience of painting and cancer? Then describe what is happening in a love letter? This new process began Wednesday. I painted with red tempera lines, one over another, then went into it with color and acrylic. Three hours later I was surprised two white doves had appeared. It was Ash Wednesday. Today I begin a 14-day oral chemo med and go to the studio. Thank you Holy Spirits for helping me.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Acrylic and Tempera on Paper 24″x18″ 02.14.2024

Dear Life, The SFCC heating/cooling system needs some attention. Either the studio is heated hot or the the system is completely off and its cold. I prefer the heat especially on mornings when it’s 28 degrees. I spoke with the head of Arts Department and hope to arrive to a warm space today because not painting is too costly. I end up at art supply stores spending mucho bucks on materials in preparation. Time to paint! Bien Fait!
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Dear Life, A white on white still-life was setup to paint in warm and cool tones with four colors. The overhead lights washed out the deep shadows in the photograph but you can get the idea. I’m happy to play with paint, light, space, and line. My body is learning to navigate the energy requirements to be in a five-hour workshop. I’m grateful cancer treatments have not taken away my desire and passion for art-making.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Photograph                Painting

Dear Life, I’m not sure if I look like a deer in headlights or have happy anticipation in that smiling face. I am grateful to be in school and have a studio on campus. Enjoy meeting students and professors and seeing the artwork throughout the campus. This is the energy boost I’ve needed to get out of quarantine, safely and with discernment, and be in a new community. Hey, I can get “student discounts”, too. Happy.

Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Dear Life, When I am told oral chemo meds along with infusions need to continue to prevent new growth of cancer cells tears rise onto the edge of paradox: clear scans, prevention treatment. Breathe deep and feel it all. I am in the 1% of the 1% who has kept living with the diagnosis, prognosis, and treatments I’ve received.
Next emotional state is gratitude.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Symphonic Poem Watercolor with Rose Petals

Dear Life, “Bien Fait”. Well Done. This bag is a “Swag Gift” from 2015 Newport Folk Festival. Patti Smith headlined. My dear friend and Patti’s drummer, Jay Dee, invited me. Three days of fun and great music. Now the bag transports my daily supplies to and from home to studio. As does the “Dreams Do Come True” bag from the Dollar Store. It’s all a gift aka “Swag”. Today is busy: Bloodwork at 8:00am. Studio 9-11. At noon meet contractor at apartment to put furniture back in place. Then two doctor appointments: 1:30 Oncologist to discuss oral chemo plus treatments. 3:00pm Meet new Primary Care doctor. Breathe and know I am in the care of my Higher Power.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Studio 723C Door