Dear Life, Woke at 4:30am and couldn’t sleep so listened to a meditation on HOPE:
“the certainty that something makes sense regardless of outcome”.
The meaning-making moments I share with nurses, technicians, doctors, hotel staff, grocery clerks, friends, family, community, watching the sunset, smiling at a stranger, making art. These are events that make my life meaningful > spirit connected. Hope resides within me and all around me when I stop my restless mind, drop into my heart, pause, and notice > This is life. Live and Love.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose
PS Girlfriends, that’s Prada in the collage. Just sayin!

Dear Life, A successful trip to Denver with good buddies who took great care of me. Slept 11 hours in my bed. Results of tests will be next week. The “healing nest” in Denver where I will live with a caregiver after Stem Cell Replacement has to be within 20 minutes of Presbyterian St. Lukes Hospital. Many moving parts. Sending out good housing and care vibes for all the pieces to come together. Thanks for all your positive vibes, too!
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Dear Life, At 9:00 am, my friends, Marilyn and Sandy, pick me up and I pile into their back seat. We head to Denver, eat sandwiches in the car, and enjoy the drive. Upon arrival, we look at lodgings near hospital that will be suitable for “Big Denver” then get settled in our downtown hotel. Walk to dinner and have an evening to enjoy the city. Safe travels ahead!
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Dear Life, I’m preparing for “Little Denver” trip July 6-8. Friends are driving and going with me. There’s two days of tests, scans, x-rays, spinal tap, and bone biopsies. We’ll look at hotels near hospital for Big Denver July 22 – Sep. The social worker told me on the day of implanting my new Stem Cells there will be a “new life blessing”. I will let you know the day and time in August so your prayers can be a part of it.
See you tomorrow Denver…
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Dear Life, “Current theories suggest that curiosity is actually the true fountain of youth”.
I support this theory. I was born with a curious nature. This has helped me be open to new ideas and experiences. When I reframe anxiety with curiosity, I move with grace into situations that would otherwise cripple me with fear.
As a child, I listened intently to the ocean inside of a conch shell. I am still that child. Curious.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Dear Life, When I feel empathy, I am held in grace. There is no expense to me. I respond with kindness and understanding. When I feel anger, resentment, or the need to control everything, there’s a high price I can’t afford that zaps my energy and is life-threatening. I drop my mind into my heart, let go of all the stories, and lean into love.
This works. It really does.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Dear Life, Informative talk with oncologist about the “world opening up”. What will we see happen? I must navigate the risks of Covid/virus strains. My body has to be healthy and ready for Stem Cell Replacement in 24 days. Living with cancer and upcoming treatments is a bigger picture. Every move must be conscious to raise the chance of recovery.
We are each responsible for our choices and health. I am responsible.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Dear Life, I am blood rich after 6 hours of infusions. Bed was my location afterward as new blood mingled with my blood. Rest along with some movement is imperative. Staying strong requires staying in motion. Today I go to the Cancer Center for blood tests and oncologist visit. Hope to see those blood counts go up and my energy, too, with each passing hour. And I’m looking for that natural pink blush to return in my smile.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Dear Life, Up early. I go to Christus Hospital Infusion Center 7:30am – 2:30pm to receive blood and platelets. My body needs this fuel to restore and rejuvenate. I am grateful for the blood donors, medical professionals, and friends helping me. My Spirit moves me though each experience with amazing grace. My body and mind tag along in awe!
So here we go… to take my “seat” on the infusion train.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose