Dear Life, A dose of chemicals and a PET scan threw my system into disorder. The cure and prevention of cancer is rigorous, physically, mentally, and emotionally. I cried afterward. I value my life and body so I do what has to be done. Thank you for all the messages of love. I feel them and they matter. You matter. Life matters.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose
Dear Life, I have a Petscan at 8:30-10:30am. I call this “tubing it” for 30 minutes after sitting in a dark room for 45 minutes receiving a chemical infusion for the scan. This is routine, post-cancer. Hope to have results on Thursday. Always a little nervous. Please send me positive thoughts. I appreciate your support.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose
Dear Life, I received an email on Saturday from my former husband acknowledging the “many glorious years” we shared. I’ve said about marriage and divorce that we had a good marriage until we didn’t. Then we moved on. The end was messy. Change usually is messy as emotions get a chiropractic adjustment into a new life. I learned to make it through the mess.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose
Dear Life, Two years ago, Anne Lamott met her husband through OUR TIME, the online dating service for the mature audience. I was so inspired, I wrote a personal profile, added recent pictures, and jumped on the site fully expecting to meet mine. I am laughing while writing to you from my loft, living alone, and wondering, how does that work?!? and during COVID?!? Feeling like a teenager with Spring Fever.
Yours Truly, Pamela
Dear Life, This morning’s dream: I was with my former husband. He was getting ready to leave for work in another country and I was staying in our beautiful home. Woke with the memories of living in a marriage that had died long before the divorce. As hard as it was to get divorced, it was necessary in order to live a new life with promise. I believe in living a life of love. Love Life, Live Life, Today.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose
Dear Life, I am happy for the snow in Santa Fe. We have been in a drought so need every inch of precipitation. While it snowed, I walked to a nearby store. Bought a Spring denim dress and sunglasses. Retail Winter Therapy. I am ready!
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose
Dear Life, I am grateful to the author Gabrielle Glaser, American Baby: A Mother, a Child, and the Shadow History of Adoption. My daughter and I will be reading the book together as a way to understand the system that both helped when we were young but prevented us from meeting for over 30 years when we were adults.
Courage to come out of the shadows.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose
Dear Life, Woke up to a white wonderland. Snow Day. That means happily staying in bed, drinking coffee, writing, reading, and enjoying winter from inside. I am grateful to be moving out of the cultural shadow of being a “birth-mother”. Today, I am living in the light of love. Connecting with my daughter is a miracle.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose
Dear Life, My daughter sent me a bucket full of roses for Valentine’s Day. Thank You. On January 14th, 2020, hours after I was diagnosed with Lymphoma, the daughter I had released for adoption 51 years ago, connected with me through Ancestry.com. I believe in miracles. I believe in love. Happy Valentine’s Day!
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose
Pamela Rose Markoya 