Dear Life, Cancer treatment can hijack my body and put all the brakes on any plans. Tuesday the immunotherapy injection laid me flat for 36 hours plus counting. Although this is somewhat predictable, it is not easy. The body has to assimilate the medication into my blood stream, muscles, and body. Toast with peanut butter and honey agrees with my upset stomach. I’ve delved into the solitude, reading, being quiet, and sleeping. Body feels a bit more energy today. My mind is above the horizon line of darkness. Cropped photo is from a project in Jan 2019 just after an 11 day stint in the hospital. I have ample practice at this. Bed Patience.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Dear Life, The “cloudiness” in my lungs is an inflammation caused by one of the clinical medications multiplying my white cells. Prednisone will clear irritation in time. There is a pause in the infusion treatment. I did receive injection of another immunotherapy drug that is scheduled every 8 weeks. After Cancer Center visit, home to rest. Sleep is a healing energy. Body is responding well to the steroid. Most side effects are gone. I daily affirm the ongoing healing and strength of my body. The cancer is receding.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Dear Life, My heart is blasted wide open with the love directed towards me as I begin my 69th Revolution Around the Sun. I feel it and it feels good. A Rainbow Tunnel flooded with color, light, beauty and joy. Stepping into the future with hope is an act of faith one in which I’ve witnessed many walking before me. I pay attention to their movements and decisions then reflect on what is best for my journey. Today will include oncology appointment and immunotherapy injection. Lunch and dinner have been tentatively planned with friends. Studio in the afternoon. Health, Community, Creativity. Grace and Gratitude. Life and Love.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Dear Life, This smile came into the world on May 23, 1953 at 3.56pm. I was born with an amazing Life Force that has moved me through 69 revolutions around the sun. And I’ve never been more excited to begin a new cycle. There’s a tingling in my energy (and it ain’t just the steroids) that is growing towards new horizons and dreams. I feel grateful, hopeful, and immensely cared for with love from family, friends, fellowship, and the medical community. We experience this thing called LIFE’S JOURNEY together.
My Spirit thanks your Spirit. Happy Life!
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Dear Life, A memorable day with a friend was enjoyed in Abiquiu and El Rito beginning the celebration of my upcoming last year of my 60’s! A new year with new ideas, dreams, intentions, curiosities, inquiries, understandings, perceptions, hopes. A new time of discovery. A season of healing. Opening up space for JOY within and expanding outward into greater horizons. A new chapter of living. It is safe to dream, to open up myself to life. My Life Force is strong. Each day, be present, reflect, connect, create, record my findings, and prepare to do it all again.
My INTENTION for this year is LIVING AND LOVING FULLY.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Dear Life, On 05.21.1949, The marriage of Louis Markoya and Rose Toth started the family I was born into. Louis Jr, was born 01.01.1951. I followed on 05.23.1953. My parents and older brother were my first influencers, for better or worse. Loving and complex, as all families, building my bones for life. Dad passed away in July 2014 but Rosie is still rolling strong in her 90’s. Louis is one of the genius artists of our times. And I am grateful for their influence in helping to form the unique person I am today.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Dear Life, Male influencers are in my life creatively and this is one. We met in 2017 over a meal with friends in Santa Fe. He was on a cross country motorcycle trip. Life kicked me from under the table and handed me a new journey: We became “pen pals” between 2018-2020 on nearly a daily basis. We continue to correspond on a less regular basis. Lives change. He is a brilliant writer and imaginative artist who lifts my spirit and work. Communicating solely through letter-writing is a lost art form. I am grateful for the many letters of thoughtful and provocative ideas exchanged on numerous topics that deepened my curiosity, perceptions, and insights. One novel he’s written, Love In The Time of Cancer, was a teacher for what was to come in my life. Thank you James for your presence in the world. May everyone get to read your pages and Voice Beyond Measure.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Dear Life, I’ve had extraordinary experiences in my 60+ years on the planet. (Coming up to a birthday soon). Meeting Sting on 09.04.1996 during his Mercury Falling Tour has been one. When we met, it felt like old souls reuniting. That connection never extinguishes. That same year, he wrote a song for my former brother-in-law who had AIDS, “Let Your Soul Be Your Pilot”. That song inspires me. Could have been written for me today. Which is what makes Sting a masterful songwriter. Universal Timeless Spirit and Connection. To my friend, the Troubadour, out there on the road today sharing his Voice Beyond Measure.
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose

Sting’s words from an interview: “A friend of mine has AIDS, and it’s a privilege to be around him because he has turned a corner and every moment to him is charged with meaning. He’s so aware all of the time, and so he inspired ‘Let Your Soul Be Your Pilot’. It’s a song about death, or dealing with death in a way that offers some sort of hope. I actually think it’s quite an uplifting song – the intent is for it to be uplifting.” Q magazine, 05/1996

Dear Life, The science of medicine and oncology is complex. I will give the cliff notes of my reports. Good news: the cancer is shrinking and lymph nodes are normal. Let’s all celebrate! Other news: I don’t have a head cold. There’s a cloud in my lungs. Instead of scheduled immunotherapy treatment yesterday, I was put on three weeks of steroids. The clinical trail experimental medicine can have side effects. We are watching what is happening in my lungs. I’m living in NM where there’s smoke in the air. My compromised body is doing it’s best to manage everything. I asked Oncologist, “When can I go on summer vacation?” We laughed. A window of joy opened yesterday upon hearing “cancer is receding.” Love those words!
Yours Truly, Pamela Rose